A Day In The Life of a Television Writer
Alarm goes off. Hit snooze button.
Alarm goes off again. Hit snooze button.
Alarm goes off ag...break alarm clock.
Wake up. Wonder why alarm didn't go off.
Freshly showered, dressed and ready to crank out a thousand words on novel before heading into office at TV series.
Decide can't write without little jumpstart of vanilla blonde roast from Starbucks.
Back from Starbucks, ready to crank out the novel... better check email first.
Finish reading and returning email, ready to work on novel.
Should probably check standings of fantasy soccer team.
Need new goalkeeper.
Have new Keeper, new defender, and new striker. Ready to write.
Realize it has been over an hour since last email check.
Arrive at office. Assistant hands you ratings from last night's episode.
Tell assistant to never show you ratings ever again.
Lead actor calls. LOVES the next episode. Just one question...can the bicycle he's
riding on page 3 be a Harley-Davidson instead?
Check email. Realize episode #10 is due in two days, not two weeks as you had thought.
Start thinking of episode #10 ideas.
Costume designer calls. Says her budget was gutted on last episode's dream sequence, so Brooks Brothers suit described on page 14 will have to be a hoodie and jeans. Oh, and female lead hates her entire wardrobe.
Network calls. LOVES the next episode, just have a couple of real quick questions, starting with bicycle on page 3... can it be a Segue?
Network hangs up.
Writing staff wants to know where we're having lunch.
Lunch location decided, have just enough time to work on episode #10 ideas before lunch.
Decide to ask writers about episode #10 at lunch.
Click on youtube link sent by writer friend.
Finish watching 14 youtube videos, time for lunch.
Lunch with writers. Discuss everything except episode #10.
Back from lunch, ready to tackle episode #10.
Prop man calls. LOVES the next episode. Just one question... the bicycle on page 3... mountain bike? Road? Cruiser? Red? Blue? Green? Yellow? Sparkly fringe dangling from the handlebars?
Make revisions to current script. Actor now sitting in chair on page 3.
Assistant knocks. Wants to know if you finished reading her spec she gave you 2 weeks ago.
Begin reading assistant's spec.
While looking at Cats That Look Like Hitler, get great idea for episode #10.
Female lead wants to see you in her trailer.
"No, you absolutely do not look fat in that!"
Studio calls. Wants to hear about episode #10.
Studio LOVES the idea for episode #10. But fears the network will hate it. Says network will want it less serialized, less connected to episodes #8 and #9. "How much less?" "Make it a stand alone."
Network calls to hear idea for episode #10.
Network hates idea for episode #10. Says it should be serialized and completely connected to episodes #8 and #9.
Begin writing outline for episode #10.
Assistant knocks. Wants to know what you thought of her spec.
Begin reading assistant's spec again.
Agent says he has to jump off. Will return.
Lead actor calls. LOVES the revisions for next episode. One question... can the chair on page 3 be an elliptical machine?
Finish writing outline for episode #10. Perhaps the greatest outline you have ever conceived. You are convinced this episode will finally get you an Emmy nomination.
Network calls. You've been canceled.
Agent has left for the day.
Assistant bursts into office, says Bad Robot just optioned her spec script and offered her a job on staff. Wants to know if there's anything she can do for you before she quits.
Search office for liquor.
Search Internet for jobs in the golf biz.
Open up novel file. Going to crank out 1000 words.
While doing youtube search for videos of guys getting hit in the nads, get new idea for TV series. This one will be great!
Start writing new idea.
Security arrives to "help" you clean out your office, the new JJ Abrams series is moving in in the morning.